Friday, June 06, 2008

Random Thoughts I Experienced Yesterday During My First Massage with a Male Massage Therapist.

- Wow, he's just starting right in on the butt, isn't he?

- What sort of a name is *Snack*? Who names their kid that? It sounds like a porn name. And I am not cool with the fact that he's about as old as one of my students.

- I really hope he's not one of my students.

- This is so weird. I am so uncomfortable. I am never doing this again.

- Someone's a bit of a mouth breather.

- Whatever you do, Lauren, do not fart.

- I'm probably making this guy's day. He probably has to rub hairy man back most of the time. I hope he doesn't like it too much.

- He's really pulling up on my shoulder! If he keeps going, that isn't going to be... ohmygod. My boob is in the air. MY BOOB. IS IN THE AIR.

- I can't believe I let Ian have the girl massage therapist. All because he's afraid he might like it if some dude rubs him down. He owes me.

- MY OTHER BOOB. IS IN THE AIR.

- He's doing okay, but I still don't like this on principle.

- But isn't this feminism in action? Shouldn't I feel good about this? I'm not discriminating on the basis of someone's gender! It's probably really hard for poor Snack to book appointments. I am a good person. A good feminist. Empowerment, bitches!

- I really should have worn sexier underwear.

2 comments:

~Angela~ said...

Haha. That was awesome.

Kristen said...

Very funny! I like the stream of thought.